Wednesday, November 30, 2005

Break DOWN!!.... how come this will always happens...

Well.. true.. the stress level is going up up up.... reasons are because of my high expectation... blame myself for setting the standard so high... now the problem is HOW TO MAINTAIN IT!..

i did quite well for first sem.. first time i receive awards for acedamic... back then i was just an average student for studies in school.. I didn't expect i will made into the director's list... ranked no. 17 of the cohort... 3rd best female student....

tats first sem.. imagine how many more sem must i work hard to maintain it... and gosh.. i am so slacking now... can't get my mind to focus!... concentrate on work... afraid i will not make it for the rest of the sems...

tots of going to Uni lingers in my mind... i want to go.. but then again... i m afraid.. afraid i could not make it... i know myself very well... tat i m not smart!.. i m hardworking. which sometimes just sucks... my frens could spend a few hours learning and pass.. some can pass with good marks... but me.. i use days... i cannot slack a moment... if i could just be smart... haix... here in poly.. i m not smart it is still okie.. as the pace is morderate... gives me time to catch up.. but for uni... i am afraid the train does not wait and tat if i m slow in comprehanding... i would miss the train...

Sigh!... why am i not smart... haix haix...

*Pcss Band
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